Cultivating a resilient mind in a culture of shame

Written by Adrian Anderson

30th October 2019

The basis for social control is the induction of guilt and shame” to beat us into submission and make infants of of us all.”

Unwrapping that bundle called the mind, our mind, to expose its contents is never easy, especially if we are averse to shame, is shaming or is ashamed. Its even more difficult if our falese pride or bravado is our prized possession and power and not our humility. A beautiful mind has to be consciously ruminated, consciously balanced with worry, considerably reflective and well adjusted with mediation, then planted with the seeds of wordy compassion. A healthy mind discovered, is similar to finding a hidden Kingdom. A healthy mind will never induce shame in times when compassion is most needed. For a mind to do so is an indication of it suffering and its own beatings, abuse and shame through its harsh criticism. Be kind to it too and you will eliminate the possibility our minds conflicting with the minds of others. You will notice that your resilience to unhealthy shame will grow to healthy pride there and then to be humble, accepting, appreciative, grateful and present in peace when peace is most needed.

Good words blended with God words in our internal and external expressions are the evidence of a well cultivated mind, not the references of our intellect or Ego. Everyone possess a spirit to communicate with if we believe. The antithesis that only some of us are spirited, bright and right, and demonstrates the fact that we cant escape discrimination when we are growing or existing in a similar culture and differences. God is light and we are his people shining in our darkness.

We must be active and assertive not passive or aggressive when unbinding shame to grow resilient

To challenge shameful behaviours is risky. This is due to the inteference or interruption to the frequencey of the behaviours that have become an unacceptable habit or tradition and processes to expose shame. Calling out shame or walking away from shameful behaviours requires the frequency of new behaviours to access humility, peace, empowerment, individuality, daring greatly and true self actualisation. With interruption we can walk out of the trap or bind, or callaban that keeps us in our place and stagnant. We can become we we are without permission or promotion and do God’s will and purpose. With God as our wizard, and our conscious mental activities, we can break the spell of shame attacks on our spirit and soul that has terminated and reside in our being and collective. We must see and recognising the interventions suggested by mother God or father God, that source greater than us and than the spirit of shame.

When we live in a field, a system or culture that induce internal and external shame for the cultivation of our souls, we must know God works. It takes God, references from our ancestors and at least one human be-ing to disempower shame and restore our connectedness and oneness to strengthen us on our onward journey. We must recognise then that we are not alone, and not melt away in timidity; that is resilience. We required stay to learn that shame has no real power, except through our response.

We might even become experts at shaming and being ashamed as taught by the God complex and those spell bounded by shame at the core of who and what they are, if we know. We CANNOT break the curse, the dark spirit of shame, by being vigorous and aggressive towards this spirit. It to is never alone and has a legion of other dark spirits that stand with it as manipulators. Our experiences and realities will be different if we are conditioned and fertilised in humility, not cruelty. To be resilient we need to be sprayed healthy pride and kindness, without the trauma of drought and nutrient difficiencies required for the needs of our soul.

Shame is a powerful dark emotion camouflaged with a legion of other dark emotions

You cannot “fight it out”with shame. Shame has to be asked kindly to “come out” of us and other to break the spell. We must shine light on it too as it’s so dark, well hidden, pretentious and only powerful in the dark. Imagine what Jesus said to the man in the tomb that was unbinded from his internal and external shame to set him free. They could not bind him in flesh so he could not harm himself and frighten others.

No amount of bravado or demonstration of perfectionism can hide or change the concept of the spirit of shame. Shaming appears to be an acceptable form of madness that is used to eat away at the fabric of humanity and weaken the foundations of family and other systems. The worst thing to do is to interrupt or intefere with a shamer’s shaming tactic or authoritarianism approach. There is sure to be dire consequences if you are fearful of disconnection, rejection, isolation or negative criticism. Its a moment of madness, induced in a split second and leads to disconnection or splitting from self others and the present. If the unacceptable behaviours is not treated it will cause a life time of fractions, friction, interpersonal and intrapersonal relationship difficulties and abuse. Shaming is used to rob our legacies and cause a life time prevalence of sadness.

Counter the behaviour and the emotion of shame to recover our legacy

In fact, no one can enter a strong man’s house without first tying him up. Then he can plunder the strong man’s house. – (Mark 3:27) Shame is used to bind on earth what cannot be binded in heaven.

Apart from exposing the shame and shamer we must speak truth to the situation for unbinding. The antithesis of shame is bravado and the middle ground is humility, we must have sympathy for the cultivators of shame, they know not what they do, sometimes and at other times they will. We just then set them free. The counter tatic however is to douse them with compassion truth, tolerance and recognise the bravado is to cover the suffering within and is an attempt regain control. The aim is to cover the shame at all cost even with collusion of others without their realisation. Calling on God in the moment, reminds us who is the greatest source.

God nurtures all things to be humble, the bright and beautiful and all creatures great and small. Calling on God, that is Easing God Onboard to counter the shamers Easeing God Out (EGO),  to demonstrate their human dominance. Easing God in,  prevents conflict and further shame, as we become observers of the truth of God’s work unfolding and the exposure of what true powerlessness looks like for humanity.

The feeling of shame cannot cut our throats, but it can be used to instill fear and intimidation, especially if we fear a lonely death. Isolation is not death, its separation for God’s selection and service of his purpose.

God is in all things when we exclude shame and discrimination and accepting of all his creation as an act of love. We are all light and all bright just with a different lux. Something is not created different from something else and someone different from someone else at the depth of humanity, our egotistic perspectives cause us to think so. Let’s us look at the cult, cultivation and culture of shame and shaming differently from outside, we have fresh examples. We are all not striving in mind to be and become, most likely agents of social change, or oppressor. Our actions might be an attempt to escape one or more situations, or serve our purpose through our thinking to be prestigious if we are from a starting point of poverty of all sorts internally and externally. True surplus is not going to happen with shame or with bravado only humility and a healthy confidence is ourselves. Too much shame and shaming  is as unacceptabe as too much false pride and or bravado.

Painting the an image of Positive Energy Gratitude and Oneness – balanced (P-EGO) for the resilience

Lets think about a well cultivated mind or garden and the soil and our family environment as the petri dish to hold the culture of shame or pride. To achieve bright minds and pass forward true legacy of growth and healthy pride or humility or the right medium. The soil has to be well prepared by backwards and forwards ploughing, energised by the heat of the sun, well aireated for free flow, good drainage of excess water, and any contamination. This is best achieved with unity. More important a healthy (P-EGO). Positive E-nergy, G-ratitude and O-neness and support not at the expense of the shamed peasants or workers, the common man. Shame in the mind or outside in others is contaminating and lacks grace, its disgrace. If not treated with good-word seeds, it destroys the strength of family, social or political systems, even our education systems. Contaminating words destroys the quality of the legacy of the minds we create for our children and our children’s children. It’s not the dirty pot we cook in that make our minds sick, its the quality of grace, thankfulness, appreciation and our request for nourishing blessing we ask before we eat. How did the significance of shame in the perpetuation of mental health and wellness got missed. Shame is used to erode the esteem of men, women, children and systems in the name of doing good. Is shaming a plot to sabotage the synergy of minds and strong systems to be in control, to be one up? Pity, empathy, compasion, and kindness should be allocated in shame as hurt people hurt people and its unacceptable, even if the hurt is done in an attempt for good.

Shaming – a plot to retard bright and fruitful minds

A plot of land thats too well binded can produce nothing but wishy washy plants, poor quality stocks and poor harvest irrespective of the quality of seed planted therein, and disappointment for the farmer or gardener. A person or mind binded in shame will eventually wither away in distorted growth before its harvest. A soil that is binded and set from being trampled on, is no different from a mind set shame  cultivated in a shame culture. It’s a fig tree without fruits, just leaves that sings in the wind. A shame full mind is fearful of bearing fruits to avoid being shamed for its fruitfulness.  A mind set is simply a mind entrenched without the porous qualities that allow new perspective and information to be cultivated in humility but bravado. That not to say it is not worthy of appreciation, acceptance, gratitude and to be valued. Even the dumb and ignorant can see its deficits if it lose currency. Its like planting corn every season without rotation with other crops and the same piece of land and not even feeding it with crap at least. Crap is important for the crop, but its useless without activity to nurture the soil and for its energies. There is a thin line between educating a mind and instutionalising a mind in shame.

Developing shame resilience – exposing the shame shamed and shamer and achieve humility and presence by turning up

Shaming and feeling ashamed can only happen if we allow it to happen. We can allow it to happen and sustain an attack to experience, understand its intensity of the experience and our ability to ride out the distress. We can allow it to happen now and speak truth into the attempt or behaviours of shaming and expose the shame as an abuser, or just to evaluate and strengthen our resilience as we become desensitised to shame inside. Remember that the aim of shame is to prevent connection, accurate recognition, stimulation certainty and visibility to reduce the threat to their bravado and dominance.

A tied goat dont know how loose goat feels. So is a mind in a shame bind don’t   don’t know the liberation of a mind repented of shame and has achieved humility. If the horticulture and agronomy analogy of the mind dont work, lets try animal husbandry. The mind is like a wild black horse that moves from past to future and future to past. Picking up the shame images and memories of the past and rushing to the future to plan, prepare and prevent shame. This prevents it from stopping in the present to be humble, appreciative, accepting, grateful thankful for the here and now, the gifts and legacies we have created in the past moments. The positives get lost and the shame get all the attention. While it is trotting between the two dimensions of time its not rearing on it hind legs. The problem start when there is an attempt to tame it in the present, the third a d most purposeful, enjoyable, achievable, congruent, energising dimension of time. Once we get it in the here and now we can enjoy its beauty of our mind and cultivate it to the optimum beauty and fruitfulness. We can whisper to the mind and hear its whispers back to us in a communication style that leads to true intimacy and provision of answers to our humble needs. We can hear and ask the difficult questions that provides the most beautiful answers as to what to cultivate in a humble pride. The most beautiful part of culticating such a mind is, when its in full bloom we dont have to interupt or intefere in its processing as it at its most productive. We can then ask more difficult questions and find more beautiful answers. Beauty too can be distressing and hard to accept if we are used to the ugliness of shame and cognitive dissonance -I would rather die than think about humility or give up my strong ego or look at what is causing the perpetutated shame.