True Self-Compassion vs A Hostile Mind

Written and published by: Adrian Anderson

29th June 2019

“Go quietly amidst the noise and haste and see what lies lie in silence and accept the rest as possible truths.”

It is often said that gnorance is bliss, but not in the case of not knowing or encountering compassion in any form. When it comes to self-compassion not encountering this amazing phenomenon can be as painful. It can equally as painful to discovering this beautiful thing and seeing the consequences of its deficits. Yes, its useful to make it a thing. Doing so makes it easier to keep as a part of our objective world so it can be accessed as easy as it is to access a tablet or a pill to ease  our subjective pain and suffering. For example, meeting our hostile voice, our hostile thoughts, or just recognising them with a new consciousness can be quite distressing and can cause us short term or long term distress.  The length of the distress is determined by how soon we can access our own compassion and or a healthy dosage of compassion from others to sooth the turmoil.

Dont be fooled, the opposite of compassion is not just self or other criticism as was expressed in previous blogs.  The opposite of compassion is hostility, its brutality, cruelty, intentional neglect, intentionally withholding or failing to meet a human need to cause pain and suffering,  even not giving or witholding feedback. It is said that the use of the English is the most brutal of all the languages. The deficits in human compassion is a public health problem that cost comes at a cost to family systems, groups, community organisations, government systems and society. It ansence results in serious mental health problem of different sorts, it can be as as cruel as bullying. Lack of compassion does not discriminate, it comes from hostile thoughts and  hostile behaviours that displaces peaceful feelings and experiences and turmoil. When internalised it can be seen in behaviours such as the stabbings we see in our communities. That stems from the absence of a voice that says  “be kind when we are are not right.” There  are not limits to the perpetuating of suffering due to the lack of compassion, its global, observe for yourself ,  feel foryourself and see where your suffering lie as you are true. We might see  a lack of feedback or a lack in honest communication informed by a hostile mind causing suffering. In one word it can be “mindless” set of actions as oppose to “mindful” actions, or mindless actions done with say, volatility. Just to be fair it can be done consciously or unconsciously, intentionally or unintentionally, overtly or covertly.

What is written here is from a life time of  experience and study of the deficit in self and other compassion. It is answering the question, “where will we run to on the days when we are exposed to our suffering from a hostile mind that is causing suffering inwardly or externally?” My answer is, we have to run back to ourselves, others and our most compassionate source, the breath of life. If the voice we hear when we go back to ourselves is hostile we know we are in trouble , then we have to seek a greater source. We will realise that, when we listen, we have activated a bunch of hostile voices and a noisy minds. We now need to go in meditation without medication to achieve habituation. In meditation can evaded the noises and voices that we have groomed in distractions delusions, made up fantasies and self betrayal  without being aware. Personally,  my most recent discovery of compassion and what that means, happened as a result coming face to face with my sufferings while meditating. I have since started to observe my suffering and that of others and is still learning to accept and appreciate the benefits of suffering for a purpose. The solution since then is to release them to a source greater the just “I”. The more suffering and hostility  is encounters then endured,  the more healing is experienced and the more I can help others to heal and accept suffering in a global sense. To heal I have to suffer, there is no healing without suffering and no suffering without healing.

Internalising compassion and observing its benefit in treating our own suffering, actually exposed me eventually to my own lack of self-compassionate substance and integrity. I realised that I was suffering more than was realised in some aspects and not as much in areas thought to be not as well. Hostility to self and others is not something that can be hidden by turning a blind eye or pretending that there is suffering. This minimising, denying, dismissing and normalising what is actually not acceptable with a smile.

The is a great suffering that I have come upon, that is giving compassion without compassion. There results in real subtle hostility that is experienced by those receiving from those offer soothing from an emptiness and a lack of awareness that there is no compassion coming from the compassion source. Who feels it knows.

Separating my suffering from the sufferings of others, exposed further that others were running and seeking compassion too, in different ways. In mindfulness and meditation now, I realise that most of the rock seeking encounters were done with others who were never exposed to compassion for generations or is aware of its existence.  Early and earlier in their life and still did not encounter the beautiful thing. Like me they either found it difficult to look at and accept their suffering openly.  Like me they offerd excessive amounts of compassion to others from an empty tank without recognising our pain. I am still wondering if it is by magic, mystery or a miracle, only because I am just overcoming my deficits.

Benefits of finding Self-compassion and compassion for other our community and world

More recently I have managed crawled from under the rock that I hid from the hostility of my world to assert my humanness. Since then I withdrawn several old contract that did not have compassion element written in them and will update them with new kinder ones. Coming from under the rock that was higher than “I”, With awareness I have bought a compassion-ship with the little savings of compassion I have left for myself. Maybe the right thought is “that I have managed to save some compassion since I have found its value. I have named the ship “The SS Compassion Black Rock”. It is a compassionate relation-ship with myself especially and others, not a rescue ship. Its a ship of resources, responsibility, vulnerability that steams positively and assertively along the seas of life at God’s speed. It is not allowing passive aggressiveness, rescuing with victim mentality in the mix on board. No drama is on board as there is not an invitation or space for a hostile minds on mindful the more journey. The ship is retrofitted with compassion renewable resources for creating positive e-motions and back-ups from others in case we run low on compassion, if you see what I mean. This has resulted in a greater sense of closeness, enjoyment, purpose, pleasure and peace just being.

The journey is even  more beautiful after a period of meditation with thoughts and images that lack hostility of any kind. It like Pirates of the Caribbean without the pirates. AS Dr Martin Luther King said, ‘we might have come on different boats, but we are on the same ship now.” Notice the similarities are similar and is suffering is the same, being human is the same with compassion is different. I have now come to recognise that it’s what our ancestors experienced irrespective of origin or specific traits, suffering and hostility is a global thing and is  overt and covert.

Before this, I ran to the church, to the world of psychotherapy, to realtionships and anything that was socially and externally described as a sanctuary in search for that thing called compassion. The closest I came to true compasson was in the contemplations of Rastafarian philosophy,  African Centred Psychology and the practice of mindful meditation. Their God don’t seem to show compassionate at first then necome hostile, critical, threatening.

Through accepting breath as the greatest gift of life,  it was recognised that the “I” and the “I” makes “we” and “we” makes community. God is the greatest source of all communities. I realised that because I am, others are suffering too and we are not in isolation. This humbled me too. Now, sitting still is a treat as I realised that hostility is everywhere I run to seek resources.  Sitting still I realise  I run with “myself.” I can only run to like minded places and spaces until I am more compassionate to my “self” for myself, with myself and then with others.

Its hard to conclude the thought process of contemplating, considering and communicating about a compassionate mind vs a hostile mind. The more compassion is experienced and understood through mindfulness, the more adjusted my rose tainted glass through which I see my world becomes. I open my eyes and the reality of the consequences of non-compassion and humanity and the delusions we face in a cruel world with less fear. We can then separate our need for the thing from that of others and treat our suffering, it need soothing. No one is without wounds as long as we have ancestors and a past and I can feel their pain  even though they are hundred of years away.

When we start to develop and awareness of compassion, we start to develop negative beliefs about hostility of our minds and reject hostility in all form assertively to avoid further harm. Then we start to have more positive beliefs about self and others compassion. The peace that is recovered in each compassionate moment that we experience with ourselves, others and the compassionate source that is greatest or greater than us is immeasurable, non-compare, is unique and cannot be judged even in a moment. Its displaces the old beliefs that practice makes perfect to conclude that practice makes improvement, progress, connections, oneness, energy and a gratitide that only further inner peace. When a peaceful mind walks in the hostile walks out, a compassion mind space is created. This results in cognitive, behavioural changes or transformations that eliminates negative or deficit in e-motions. Now, imagine a body without distress, a mind with compassion and global peace.

Planting the see of Compassion – to reap the clear seeing of and the need for alleviating human suffering.

COGNITIVE BEHAVIOURAL TRANSFORMATIONS
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12:2
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POSTED ON1ST JUL 2019 BY COGNITIVE BEHAVIOURAL TRANSFORMATIONS
True Self-Compassion vs A Hostile Mind
Written and published by: Adrian Anderson
29th June 2019
“Go quietly amidst the noise and haste and see what lies lie in silence and accept the rest as possible truths.”
It is often said that ignorance is bliss, but not in the case of not knowing or encountering compassion. When it comes to self-compassion not encountering this amazing phenomenon can be painful. It can be equally as painful to discovering this beautiful thing and seeing the consequences of its deficits. Yes, its useful to make it a thing. Doing so makes it easier to keep it as a part of our objective world. In so it can be accessed as easy as it is to access a tablet or a pill to ease our subjective pain and suffering. For example, meeting our hostile voice, our hostile thoughts, or just recognising them with a new consciousness can be quite distressing and can cause us short term or long term distress. The length of the distress is determined by how soon we can access our own compassion and or a healthy dosage of compassion from others to sooth the turmoil.
Don’t be fooled, the opposite of compassion is not just self or other criticism as was expressed in previous blogs. The opposite of compassion is hostility, its brutality, cruelty, intentional neglect, intentionally withholding or failing to meet a human need to cause pain and suffering, even not giving or withholding feedback. It is said that the use of the English is the most brutal of all the languages. The deficits in human compassion is a public health problem that cost comes at a cost to family systems, groups, community organisations, government systems and society. It absence results in serious mental health problem of different sorts, it can be as cruel as bullying. Lack of compassion does not discriminate, it comes from hostile thoughts and hostile behaviours that displaces peaceful feelings and experiences and turmoil. When internalised it can be seen in behaviours such as the stabbings we see in our communities. That stems from the absence of a voice that says “be kind when we are not right.” There are not limits to the perpetuating of suffering due to the lack of compassion, its global, observe for yourself , feel for yourself and see where your suffering lie as you are true. We might see a lack of feedback or a lack in honest communication informed by a hostile mind causing suffering. In one word it can be “mindless” set of actions as oppose to “mindful” actions, or mindless actions done with say, volatility. Just to be fair it can be done consciously or unconsciously, intentionally or unintentionally, overtly or covertly.
What is written here is from a life time of experience and study of the deficit in self and other compassion. It is answering the question, “where will we run to on the days when we are exposed to our suffering from a hostile mind that is causing suffering inwardly or externally?” My answer is, we have to run back to ourselves, others and our most compassionate source, the breath of life. If the voice we hear when we go back to ourselves is hostile we know we are in trouble , then we have to seek a greater source. We will realise that, when we listen, we have activated a bunch of hostile voices and a noisy minds. We now need to go in meditation without medication to achieve habituation. In meditation can evaded the noises and voices that we have groomed in distractions delusions, made up fantasies and self betrayal without being aware. Personally, my most recent discovery of compassion and what that means, happened as a result coming face to face with my sufferings while meditating. I have since started to observe my suffering and that of others and is still learning to accept and appreciate the benefits of suffering for a purpose. The solution since then is to release them to a source greater the just “I”. The more suffering and hostility is encounters then endured, the more healing is experienced and the more I can help others to heal and accept suffering in a global sense. To heal I have to suffer, there is no healing without suffering and no suffering without healing.
Internalising compassion and observing its benefit in treating our own suffering, actually exposed me eventually to my own lack of self-compassionate substance and integrity. I realised that I was suffering more than was realised in some aspects and not as much in areas thought to be not as well. Hostility to self and others is not something that can be hidden by turning a blind eye or pretending that there is suffering. This minimising, denying, dismissing and normalising what is actually not acceptable with a smile.
The is a great suffering that I have come upon, that is giving compassion without compassion. There results in real subtle hostility that is experienced by those receiving from those offer soothing from an emptiness and a lack of awareness that there is no compassion coming from the compassion source. Who feels it knows.
Separating my suffering from the sufferings of others, exposed further that others were running and seeking compassion too, in different ways. In mindfulness and meditation now, I realise that most of the rock seeking encounters were done with others who were never exposed to compassion for generations or is aware of its existence. Early and earlier in their life and still did not encounter the beautiful thing. Like me they either found it difficult to look at and accept their suffering openly. Like me they offered excessive amounts of compassion to others from an empty tank without recognising our pain. I am still wondering if it is by magic, mystery or a miracle, only because I am just overcoming my deficits.
Benefits of finding Self-compassion and compassion for other our community and world
More recently I have managed crawled from under the rock that I hid from the hostility of my world to assert my humanness. Since then I withdrawn several old contract that did not have compassion element written in them and will update them with new kinder ones. Coming from under the rock that was higher than “I”, With awareness I have bought a compassion-ship with the little savings of compassion I have left for myself. Maybe the right thought is “that I have managed to save some compassion since I have found its value. I have named the ship “The SS Compassion Black Rock”. It is a compassionate relation-ship with myself especially and others, not a rescue ship. Its a ship of resources, responsibility, vulnerability that steams positively and assertively along the seas of life at God’s speed. It is not allowing passive aggressiveness, rescuing with victim mentality in the mix on board. No drama is on board as there is not an invitation or space for a hostile minds on mindful the more journey. The ship is retrofitted with compassion renewable resources for creating positive e-motions and back-ups from others in case we run low on compassion, if you see what I mean. This has resulted in a greater sense of closeness, enjoyment, purpose, pleasure and peace just being.
The journey is even more beautiful after a period of meditation with thoughts and images that lack hostility of any kind. It like Pirates of the Caribbean without the pirates. AS Dr Martin Luther King said, ‘we might have come on different boats, but we are on the same ship now.” Notice the similarities are similar and is suffering is the same, being human is the same with compassion is different. I have now come to recognise that it’s what our ancestors experienced irrespective of origin or specific traits, suffering and hostility is a global thing and is overt and covert.
Before this, I ran to the church, to the world of psychotherapy, to relationships and anything that was socially and externally described as a sanctuary in search for that thing called compassion. The closest I came to true compassion was in the contemplations of Rastafarian philosophy, African Centred Psychology and the practice of mindful meditation. Their God don’t seem to show compassionate at first then become hostile, critical, threatening.
Through accepting breath as the greatest gift of life, it was recognised that the “I” and the “I” makes “we” and “we” makes community. God is the greatest source of all communities. I realised that because I am, others are suffering too and we are not in isolation. This humbled me too. Now, sitting still is a treat as I realised that hostility is everywhere I run to seek resources. Sitting still I realise I run with “myself.” I can only run to like minded places and spaces until I am more compassionate to my “self” for myself, with myself and then with others.
Its hard to conclude the thought process of contemplating, considering and communicating about a compassionate mind vs a hostile mind. The more compassion is experienced and understood through mindfulness, the more adjusted my rose tainted glass through which I see my world becomes. I open my eyes and the reality of the consequences of non-compassion and humanity and the delusions we face in a cruel world with less fear. We can then separate our need for the thing from that of others and treat our suffering, it need soothing. No one is without wounds as long as we have ancestors and a past and I can feel their pain even though they are hundred of years away.
When we start to develop and awareness of compassion, we start to develop negative beliefs about hostility of our minds and reject hostility in all form assertively to avoid further harm. Then we start to have more positive beliefs about self and others compassion. The peace that is recovered in each compassionate moment that we experience with ourselves, others and the compassionate source that is greatest or greater than us is immeasurable, non-compare, is unique and cannot be judged even in a moment. Its displaces the old beliefs that practice makes perfect to conclude that practice makes improvement, progress, connections, oneness, energy and a gratitude that only further inner peace. When a peaceful mind walks in the hostile walks out, a compassion mind space is created. This results in cognitive, behavioural changes or transformations that eliminates negative or deficit in e-motions. Now, imagine a body without distress, a mind with compassion and global peace.
Planting the see of Compassion – to reap the clear seeing of and the need for alleviating human suffering.
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One Reply to “True Self-Compassion vs A Hostile Mind”

  1. We all fall short, we can never be perfect. I think helping to see this in common with people in general helps us understand our own frailty.

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