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Author: Adrian Anderson
21st January 2019
This is risky, and again maybe partly correct, take the partly correct, but first see for yourself. Men, this is how we can stay and be consistent for our children and partners. Learning to communicate for the benefits, is not a one way process. Comminication takes at least two individuals, one to send the message, the other to receive the message. Hear this, power will fade after an outrage but empowering after the block out with compassionate communication, and speaking positively and assertively into relationships, will reduce suffering in the long term. Be not afraid of the images of castration and isolation of the past that might come to mind. If you are not colluding with irresponsibility and is a holding positive and assertive empowering position with love, you will be fine in the long term. What if the response to our being compassionate, is a response to fear and internalised past that our partners exxperienced when we were not safe? Images of the past is proven to evoke fear to balance the perception of power and powerlessness that has terminated and has stayed resided in our consciousness.
Compassionately holding our others while lovingly expressing ourselves, will result in the fear fading. We can achieve an example that others can follow, respect, model and remodel. There is a conversation that has been going around for a long time that good model of men are scarce and when one is found the discovery comes as a surprise and it hard to believe one has arrived. Poor communication and lack of compassion is often a contributing factor to infidelity, disconnection and resentment. Without talking and listening there can be no lasting connection or intimacy that leads to the satisfaction of needs of the relationship.
Men must have rule that they must stay inside or outside of relationship if its safe to stay. It is vital to have a lasting relationship to learn to be kind, communicate and make the invisible contribution through compassionate communication, if they are not already doing so.(Please! don not filter out the words “if you are not already doing so.”) This is how we communicate that there is a backbone we can share responsibilities so that we can support the burdens of suffering.
Loving compassionate communication is priceless, and a necessity for a soul young or old. If for no other reason that the fact it is just for its soothing. This cannot be replaced with money or in exchange for money or a pound of flesh. Saying that, money and communication enhances wellbeing. If you don’t believe ask those before us who suffered the safe fate. Money and flesh helps in the short-term, long-term it worsens consistency. That in not a request for marriage or enduring suffering if there is not communication adult to adult.
It must be clear that some persons are bullies, some are bullied, some fluctuate between both and hold an assertive position most based on our estimations. A good example is seen in the observation of adults who were never fathered or communicated positively with by persons trembling spiritually emotionally and physically from a voice that does not exude compassion constantly and is not soothing. Adults in couple relationship, family and community, depends on the communication to take them to the level of intimacy they seek to be safe to trust and gain the ability to problem solve the issues of community.